Gottman Method vs. Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)
Updated September 30, 2026 · Information, not medical advice · How we write guides
The Gottman Method and Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) are two of the approaches couples therapists mention most often. Many therapists in our listings mention both. This guide describes each in the words of the organizations that developed them. It doesn’t rank them: which one suits you depends on the two of you and on the therapist.
The Gottman Method
The Gottman Method was developed by Drs. John and Julie Gottman. The Gottman Institute describes its goals as to “disarm conflicting verbal communication, increase intimacy, respect, and affection, remove barriers that create a feeling of stagnancy, and create a heightened sense of empathy and understanding within the context of the relationship.”1
The method is built on the institute’s Sound Relationship House theory, which has nine parts, from building “love maps” (knowing your partner’s world) through managing conflict to trust and commitment. Therapy usually starts with an assessment: a joint session, individual interviews with each partner, questionnaires and feedback. After that, the work focuses on friendship, managing conflict and creating shared meaning.1
Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)
Emotionally Focused Therapy was developed by Dr. Sue Johnson. The International Centre for Excellence in EFT describes it as “a humanistic, evidence-based approach to psychotherapy, drawing primarily from attachment theory to facilitate the creation of secure, vibrant connection with self and others.”2
In couples work (sometimes called EFCT), the approach helps partners identify and change the negative patterns that cause distress in the relationship. EFT is also used with individuals and families.2
At a glance
- Developed by
- Gottman: Drs. John and Julie Gottman. EFT: Dr. Sue Johnson.
- Grounded in
- Gottman: the Sound Relationship House theory. EFT: attachment theory.
- Focus
- Gottman: friendship, conflict management, shared meaning. EFT: emotional connection and a secure bond.
Choosing between them
You don’t need to pick an approach before you pick a therapist. In a first call, ask how they work and what the first few sessions would look like, then choose the person you both feel you can talk to. Our guide to choosing a couples therapist has a list of questions.
On each city page you can narrow verified listings by approach. Find couples therapists by city.